Freedom From Fear-Based Thinking

Sometimes a feeling arises.

And almost instantly, the mind creates a story around it.

In this episode, I reflect on the link between meditation and real-life emotional reactivity, and what can happen when we stop automatically believing every fearful thought that appears in response to how we feel.

A gentler, more spacious relationship with our emotions may be closer than we think.

✧ A Question to Reflect On

What might shift if you allowed a feeling…without immediately attaching a story to it?

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Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:02

Your soul craves something more. Your heart wants joy, not busyness. You're done with all the shits and ready to reconnect with what truly nourishes you. Welcome, I'm Rachel, and this is the Soft Way podcast. A space to quiet the noise, release the pressure, and listen to the voice within you that's always known your truth. Join me for soulful practical insights to help you ground the presence, connect with your higher self, and let this version of you lead your life with playfulness and gentle power. And without the pressure to figure it all out. Because you are supported. Life is with you. So come on home. Hello. So today I'm going to tell you a little story. And this is for anyone who feels perhaps somewhat overly sensitive, who feels strong emotions quite often. Maybe someone who can sense that their emotional habits are creating more friction in life than is probably necessary, or certainly more than is desired. And the point of this episode really is to remind us of the freedom that is available in terms of how we feel. So some time ago, I was upstairs on my terrace meditating. And suddenly, at some point during the practice, I realised I had to go downstairs. I had to grab something. I think it might have been a jumper, maybe it was cold. So I went to grab the thing and then I walked up the stairs again and sat back down on my cushion. And as I settled back into my meditation posture, started to kind of bring my awareness back into my body, back into the present, I noticed that I was feeling anxious. vibe. And I found this really interesting. And so with this clarity, this understanding, this awareness, I was able to just quickly release the label of anxiety and just allow the sensations to bubble away in my body and eventually disappear. And then not long after that, as I sat down to work, I remembered something from the week before of like work-related. Um, this was on a Monday morning, by the way. And I realized that there was this task that I might have to do, but I really, really didn't want to do it. And suddenly my body tensed up, my heart rate went up, and my thoughts just started like ping-ponging around in my head, you know, thoughts of resistance basically. Like, I don't want to do that. Oh my god, the calm day that I just set up for myself has just like disappeared in an instant. So basically, I had this strong reaction. And after a while, I remembered the moment on my meditation cushion. I remembered how quickly my mind just started going off and interpreting how I felt, you know, making this like very quick assumption about the state of things basically. And so I thought to myself, this is linked, like these are just feelings, like the feelings that I have in my body right now are just feelings. Like my body is reacting to stuff, and my mind is reacting to how my body feels. My mind is making assumptions yet again, and actually, I don't have to listen to what my mind is saying. I can run with that, or I can just let go of those stories, and I can allow the feelings, the sensations to just be there, just like I did that morning. And so I did. I released the story, and I kept on releasing the story every time it tried to take over, as happens with the mind. And I was able to just kind of watch the sensations in my body with a certain friendliness, and lo and behold, my thoughts about the unpleasant task that was waiting for me or might be waiting for me that week started to shift. I started to feel like I can do this, like it will be fine. This shift felt authentic, it felt empowered. It wasn't about me resisting my emotions and just trying to think better thoughts, trying to just be resilient, you know. I just wasn't identifying with my emotions anymore. And I wasn't listening to the mind's automatic reactions to my emotions, and so naturally, what I truly thought about the situation that was able to emerge on its own. And I honestly felt this like joy at this because this is just the type of thing that might usually set me on a course for a completely stressed, contracted day, and it was resolved in a matter of moments because of me having a different level of awareness about how things were working inside of me, you know. So I just felt this sense of my energy being restored. Like, I don't have to battle, there's nothing to battle with, you know. So I'm just curious as I say this, what is coming up for you? Like, what is coming to mind when you think of maybe situations where your mind is very quick to tell you something, and how easy it is to just run with that, you know, run with these disempowering ideas that feel very factual. So just take a moment just to think about that. And not in this kind of judging yourself way, but just out of curiosity, maybe even a playful curiosity. Where have I been letting my mind jump to conclusions and reel off this disempowering narrative based on my emotions, based on my sensations, based on things outside of me. So where have I been doing battle unnecessarily? And maybe reflecting also on what might happen if I separated the story from the emotion from the feeling What would it be like to remember that the story is just a story? What would it be like to just stay with the feeling stay in the present moment? Now, as I said, this isn't an opportunity to judge our emotional reactivity. Just a moment of of awareness of maybe there's an opportunity for freedom to be gained. And I also want to say that it's not to say that everything is all in your head. Some situations are a hell no, you know. And often, yeah, there may be a seed of truth in something. Maybe something is kind of unfair, kind of unideal, kind of painful. But remembering also that our minds are wired to overreact. That is kind of their job because their job is to keep us safe. And if overreacting means that we can't possibly miss the opportunity to swerve out of the way of danger, then our mind is gonna make a lot of assumptions and go toward the worst case scenario. So it's about taking our power back and kind of training our minds like it's an unruly little puppy with some friendliness and kindness and a little bit of firmness too. Cause our energy is so precious, so important in the momentum that we create through our reactions and our actions determines our experience. Okay, so if you are noticing, actually, yeah, there are situations where it maybe, like maybe, maybe there is something here where I could just remain present. I can think of countless times when I've let my mind run away thinking I'm small, thinking I'm not good enough, thinking that others don't like me, or thinking that things are hopeless, or that I'm gonna get in trouble simply because of the way my body feels. Because my mind is making very quick assumptions, and because some old emotional circuitry has quite activated the stories that we tell ourselves, we don't have to keep telling them. You know, we can notice, we can release, and we can remain present. And what this means is that we don't have to try to stop feeling anxious in order to feel more at ease. These reactions can feel very convincing when they suddenly become active within us. And yeah, feelings are just feelings. We can notice them, watch them, feel them. Because they're not the enemy. And there's more than enough space for these feelings and you to coexist. And you don't have to over-exert yourself trying to be clever and try to rewrite the story that's triggered by your feelings either. You don't have to try and think better thoughts. Maybe all that's asked of you is to stop taking the old familiar ones that don't feel good so seriously. Coming back to presence and letting the truth that's within you emerge quite effortlessly on its own. I invite you to just watch with curiosity over the next few days and just see. See where a bit of space, a bit more presence, and a bit more truth can come into your awareness and your experience. Thank you for listening, and I'll speak to you again very soon. Take care.